Now this one came out of left field, just like the last picture this one is also a 2nd draft. The first draft was really good, I hadn't fully finished my alternative look to match my two friends but the way I took their version was intense. They ended up with some sexy af photo angles but because I had to fit this motorcycle in the picture my angle ended up being trash. It probably wasn't that bad but I hated it personally. Luckily for me my friends are real ones and didn't mind retaking it with me. Ended up blogging MORE items including this super interesting Lavarock pose. I love it, it's a cuckold 'good wife' pose but the way it's set up and how the image is set up in no way do I come off as a cuck lmfao. Just the hottest intimidating vibes from this, makes me feel like I'm in control even though Blade is totally RAILING Knives lmfao. Anyways Knives and Blade are a super monogamous couple so anybody thinking this is more than just a picture is trippin.
As for me, idk, things have been weird and confusing for a while at this point, just normal amounts of drama nothing that I really care to mention the biggest thing is that I'm still very much in love with Gene and I think about it all the time and I have so many confusing feelings about it. I regret ending it with her for sure, always but at the same time I feel relieved because I don't think it would have ended well later. I want her but also I definitely don't deserve her and it's confusing as fuuuuck. Actually things did get rocky between her and I for a bit, she has been hanging with a new guy friend and I kept feeling neglected cuz she'd blow me off for hours at a time and I'd log in to see her cuddling with this dude and great. I'm happy she has fiends but at the same time I feel stupid for worrying about her that entire time when she was just fine. Anyways it turned into more than it was, I was more than a bit jealous and it was a big wake up call I need to start letting go so that's what I've been trying to do. But FUCK if it isn't the most painful thing in the world to let go of the love of my life. I don't want to and she keeps giving me mixed messages. So just, in a world of uncertainty I think and its' really been wearing me down as time goes on.