No Credits
This isn't going on my flickr and I'm not blogging anything in it. My 'friend' we'll say asked me to take and edit a picture for them in order to learn how I use photoshop. The irony here is that they're the one who taught me photoshop in the first place. It's true I've learned a lot from a few other people as well but she was the primary who taught me my method. It was also about HOW I take pictures in black dragon, I think she said she learned a lot from that too. I slightly regret doing it though because I did such a good job and I'll get almost no credit, they credited me of course but like who reads those.
The part I guess that I hate is that this 'friend' and I are supposed to be a little bit more than that and have been for a little bit but you would literally never know. There's no evidence of it anywhere. I don't know how to feel about it, I've been a fuckboy before and for a while after joining SL in 2021, can you blame me? Now I'm trying to settle down into something and it feels like either they're ashamed of me or they're keeping me on the DL because they're playing the field. Either way it's a shitty feeling, I know I only kept things on the DL because I was playing the field, and maybe her reason is the only reason. She doesn't like the attention but she wants all of my attention? There's other reasons I'm insecure about the relationship, how she interacts with certain other guys, it feels like I'm the only one treated like I'm not shit but she treats certain other people like they're lovers. I don't ask for a lot, I really don't. I don't think it's unfair of me to want my relationship out there to at least ward off the guys who think she's single, or keep people out of my DMs as well.
Anyways I'm only writing this here because like 4 people read this blog ever and only when I post them to face book because I want to get as much exposure for my flickr as possible. It's just nice to vent somewhere and maybe someone will see it. But also I held back a lot just in case someone does see it x) idk. I don't know anymore, this is a cry for help and maybe for some advice from a 3rd party. The highs of this relationship are very high but the lows make me feel really low, I'm getting a lot more affection than the first round but idk how long till the bell rings on round 2. I just want to be wanted as much as I want someone else, not hidden away on a private island and used. Wish me luck my 4 readers, I need all of it.